Picture taken from TheStar.com.myDivorce, child support and alimony are the 3 most reasons why couple go back and forth in the court. Being a Muslim in a muslim country such as Malaysia, all things related to the religion are handled by the Syariah Court. Islam is a fair religion and does not discriminate women. That, I truly believe. Unfortunately, most (not all but most, ok?) of the people running these religious agencies are nowhere close in being fair to women. Especially divorced women, be it with or without children.
I am sure that I am not alone in thinking this way. How many men that you know of personally, after they are divorced, actually pay child support voluntarily? And why should anybody have to go to court to get child support on the first place anyway? Are they not your children too? The ones getting divorced are you and your spouse. Not you and the children. How could anybody treat their own children that way? And yet they call themselves a muslim! If any of you readers fall into that category, I have this to say to you, "SHAME ON YOU!".
The scenario is of course different for non muslims especially in non muslim countries where it is the women who have the upper hands and they would use the children to get back to their exes by giving minimum or no access at all to the children. Again, not all and sometimes the situations are such that minimum or none at all are for the best interest of the children. (Think of abusive, drugs or alcohol addicts). But that is another story for another day.
Today it is all about the picture above of a woman who had gone to the syariah court to fight for the child support that the ex husband had conveniently failed to pay totalling to RM50,000 (USD14,500). Sounds like a normal case huh? Well, it should be except that instead of being angry that child support was not paid to her, the judge was angry at how she was dressed! This is what the judge said to her,
“You are not here for a photo shoot. Wearing a vest over a blouse makes it look as if you are going for war,” said Saarani (the judge), before telling Shafnie’s lawyer to advise her client on the dress code for appearing in a Syariah court.
What. The. Hell.
36 comments:
It should be enough as long as the woman tak bogel or pakai tak senonoh to the court. Itukan hak perempuan untuk menuntut nafkah anak dia. I am sorry to hear sad story like this. I pray this lady will get what she deserved. It is not cheap to raise children nowadays.
*sigh*
i have nothing to say about this other than to shake my head about it.
"ridiculous" can't even begin to describe the judge.
also, she should've said, "hell yeah, i'm going to war. a war for the sake of my children! celaka."
pardon my french but i have zero tolerance for stupidity.
baju pun jadi issue kan? *sigh*
Zue, I had to read the story a few times to check if I had read it wrong but it's not. I feel like slapping that stupid judge!
Nic, the things that we, muslim women sometime have to deal with back home. sigh.
Katya, I think the judge has personal issues problem but that doesn't give him/her the right to say that to Shafnie.
yeah fern, what the hell...
I scratched my head when reading about this. There is always someone who will make us the laughing stock.
Can you recall any war that has its combatants dressing like that? Furthermore it was not that tight and all her 'aurat' were covered.
There must be some prejudice about muslim women dressing in a modern way that the judge could come up with such a statement rather than focusing on th real matter at hands.
It is sad that the women are already on the losing side when they come to the religious authorities to seek justice.
They really need to change their male chauvinist perspective.
WTF!!??? Goodness gracious me Farina, in this day & age, in a modern country, still we hv such judges. hai, frustrating babe to hear such stories..... Thx for sharing, very eye opening entry ; ) I am such a feminist, so stuch topics i feel strongly for. Thx for sharing! good one Farina, happy holidays and cheers for a great 2009!
there are some people who are like this. trying to make an issue out of nothing, so that as if they are making themselves look 'smart' which is surely not.
n yeah, why this is to be the issue.
n for god sake, y do people have to drag the kids into it.
Eehh, benggang Cath baca... Apa kena mengena dengan cara dia berpakaian pulak... Make no sense!
WTH!!! She looks good and professional wearing a vest. She's in a loosing battle when a judge already making that kind of remark. All she has to do is to go get help from people high above like a big time politician. It's all about politic..... when you know somebody, you'll get what you want.
As for not paying child support.... a lot of exes wasn't thinking about their children. They're thinking about getting back to their exes and making their exes life as miserable as they can. These people need to grow up and take up their responsibilities to their children.
In US the court also has a dessing code (formal) and the case can take a long time if you can't agree with your exes. Sometimes they have to drag their children to the court too. That's what I am trying to avoid with my own case. It's not good for the children. Luckily, in US we have Child Support Dept. and if my STBX didn't sent the money I could go straight to the child support dept and open a case and they will collect the money from him. I also could report him and he'll be sent to jail for not paying child support (I don't think I have the guts to do this. I can't ruin his background records and his family will hate me). Anyway, that's a diff. story. Sorry for the long comment, I couldn't help myself.
Mad, itulahnya. Lepas sorang,sorang buat statement bangang macam tu but coming from a judge it is really unacceptable! Argh! I really wanna give that judge a kick in the arse.
Mush, in this case, one need not be a feminist to be mad. I hope some kind of action is being taken to that judge.
Dr.No, ud expect bigots to act like taht but from s judge? Syariah judge lagi tu. Mana yg adil nya kalau dah ckaap macam tu?
Cath, i pun tengah bengang giler lah ni. Kalau dia pakai bikini ke or short skirt ke lainlah kan? Kita fahamlah itu syariah court so kena extra cover.
Yatie, I pun suspect that judge jealous sbb Shafnie looks very pretty and demure in that outfit. Here in the US, memang the exes susah sikit nak lari unless dia disappear lah but most are willing to pay since they want to be part of their children's lives.
but trust me, there are husbands who would go at any lengths just to get the visitation rights. money apparently was the least of the problem.
hmmm...
Far.. by and large, the local syariah courts are dominated by (unfortunately) unenlightened (male) clerics. The law is there and they should just follow the law. No need to impose their own personal and moral agendas. SIS, WAO, etc. has done a good job in highlighting and hleping the plights of these women, and they should be commended as such, instead of being vilified by other trivial matters.
Enough of the depressing topic. Happy holidays, ya?
Kerp, of course there are some cases where the ex-husbands were not giving visitation rights eventhough he pays the child support but I have yet to hear such cases in Malaysia. :P
Mat Salo, that's why it pisses me to no end that the judge attacked her dressing instead of on the case. I wouldn't say it's just the male clerics who are enlightened. sigh.
I don't know how many times I have to read the post .. trying to figure out the what I've read was right .. I don't know .. sometimes you are left wondering .. do those ppl know what they are doing ??? .. strange ..
xda apa pun dgn baju shafnie,heran betol lah,jeles nangga baju kacak hahaha
I think the way she dressed up is right and correct for the time n placce. Nak gi perang ngan people like the judge, small minded people. Mcmana lah org lain tak make fun on Islam, sbb setengah2 org Islam sendiri yg memburuk kan agama sendiri. Islam tu sendiri indah. Tp org2 gini yg memburukkan. Really sad. Sad .... ;(
ps - I ni your silent reader. Tapi bila baca yg ni, marah sgt rasanye.
Envy, itulahnya. Nak kata bodoh, jadi judge. so how?
Dayang, aouk lah. Nang judge ya nangga dgn sidak Shafnie ya. Rupa kacak, baju pun kacak.
Flower, thank tou for coming out of your hiding to comment. ;) Its true what you said, We have no one else to blame but ourselves when other people make fun or Islam.
my...my..my... who spoilt the curd of that ridiculous judge??? Or has he kicked by his wife the day before? What about Shafnie's husband, how he looked like... long haired and colored! Almost like a Katoey! His stage name even sounds like AC MIlan... :-|
Though am not a Malay, i felt just as angry too as being a female is regardless your race or religion. Why not changed the judge to a female instead? Sometimes, the males never think that they were given by birth by females as well.
I felt sometimes (actually most of the time) religion laws were manipulated for the sake of controlling and the benefits reaped by those behind it.
From the photo, Shafnie dressed sensible and covered. She may dressed that to feel confidence but the judge could be intimidated by her power dressing...duhhhh...
Shame on the judge. Way out of topic with why they were in court in the first place.
Happy New Year to you and ur hubby. May 2009 be a great year.
Happy New Year !!
Wishing you & Michael a happy & prosperous new year.
Take care and see you soon.
Pixen, yes the keyword here is 'manipulate' and that is what those ppl do most of the times. Im not sure if the judge is a woman or a man but wht was done is BS.
NW, that's why lah kan? So out of topic. Bodoh sungguh! Anyways, Happy New Year to you and wife as well.
Barbara, thank you and Happy New Year to you too!
what?? I dont know whether to laugh or to cry! what's the issue here, judge? baju ke sara dan nafkah yang tak dibayar? all goes to discredit the woman who i believe is decently dressed. Must go and google this story. Thanks.
Kak Teh, did you find the story? It was in thestar that day itself.
Hi!
I'm shaking my head after reading your post. To have the cheek to say it is one thing, but to actually get away with it, is in fact worse.
Rest assured, there were many tukang angguk when he said that :(
Naz, oh yeah. tukang angguk yg rasa diorang confirm masuk syurga memang ramai kat Msia tu. grrr
Let's face it. The people who work in Syariah are (generally, not everyone) small-minded, religious bigots. Justice and fairness play a small role in the whole so-called justice system..they are out to get anybody and everybody who make the slightest mistake because that's how they get their kicks. If that's all they have in their life to make them happy, then let's hope that God has mercy on their souls! Religious Bigots! Down with Syariah - it should be ABOLISHED.
People should be free to live their own lives, so long as it doesn't hurt anybody else and not have some ancient set of archaic laws imposed on them. Abolish Syariah!
Kak Farina, firstly, Happy New Year!
As for the judge, I hope that in future that Saarani goon uses the brains Allah dah kurniakan kat dia. Like hello? What's the issue at hand here - nafkah budak-budak or how the lady dresses? I tell you, bodoh nak mampos. Malaysia boleh!
Dear anons, are you saying that if the teachers suck then we should abolish school? That doesn't make sense does it?
Nadia, thank you and Happy New Year to you too! Been so long sis. Saarani tu, pandai2 lah menjawab soalan later in life. Sekarang bolehlah dia besar kepala sbb dia judge. Write to me and access to the blog pls ok?
Dear Salt - don't be silly. Schools are there to benefit us. Syariah does not.
In fact we are lucky we dont live in Saudi where you can get stoned to death. Like that lady who was raped. Is it her attackers who pay? Nope..it's the woman who pays with her life - all because of Syariah law.
Syariah benefits nobody. In many cases, supercedes basic human rights and many people are killed or have jobs and reputations destroyed because of it.
That is why the world would be a better place without Syariah.
Farina,
The judge must have been blurr and didn't know what he was judging in the first place.Nak tunjuk macho konon, MCP! Kat mana dia dapat degree syariah dia tu, if he has any?...grr...berasap i...
SNT,
I was not at all shocked reading this...once i was accompanying my makcik utk mintak cerai from her hubby yg dah 13 years hilang tanpa khabar berita...so my makcik ni takut, suspen, semua ada so mintak i temankan...suddenly i dgr suara
"Org yang punya kes saja masuk , org yg punya kes saja blh masuk" i pusing belakang and saw the pembantu pegawai pendaftar kat belakang i...skit pun dia x pandang i tau...so kurang ajar..tegur la elok2 kan...okay takpe lagi bab tu...as my makcik kat dalam, i pun nak bertanyalah pasal kes ni to the pembantu pegawai pendaftar td tu, boleh dia buat mcm i ni x wujud depan dia...dia blh buat tak layan i cakap, as if i was not standing in front of him at all!!...wah i panas la kan..so kurang ajar....i ikut belakang dia masuk office dia and tanya what is your problem...then dia pun bersyarah dgn pnjg lebar kat i menggunakan bahsa kasar and mcm i ni bodoh x pegi sekolah...i terus ckp "eleh eksyen, baru jd pembantu dah berlagak..." dan i terus blah...
u know lepas tu dia terus pospon my makcik punya kes punya lama..and my makcik tunggu kat luar office utk dptkan new session dia x layan smp makcik i pegi tanya...dgn selambanya mamat tu told my makcik yg i kurang ajar!!! I sungguh lah marah..kalau i yg kurang ajar pun, apa kena mengena dgn makcik i kan...lepas tu kerani tu blh pulak suruh i sabar kata nnt i kena penjara 3 hari sbb melawan court...bila la pulak i melawan court pun x tau lah...and after a while i tgk judge keluar dgn rokok kat mulut mcm gangster je...
terukkan? tu belum cerita i nak kawin tu..so penin kepala dgn kerenah mereka2 tu...
Yus, ada degree tapi tak guna otak nak buat apa. nyampah i.
Lyana, Iv heard so many stories how the the women were badly treated by the jabatan agama people. kesian u and your makcik. Rasa nak lepang aje mamat tu. Kurang ajar sungguh. Pandai agama konon tapi yg dia treat orang macam tu, dia tak nampak. grrr.
I would like to comment on this.
I have a case in syariah court since 2003 in syariah court.
However I would to say that its not the courts thats not beneficial to us women. Its some of the men in the syariah judicial system that manipulates it and give judgements that are not fair to us women. The systems/procedures are not helpful to us either. It promotes for the cases to be prolonged for the benefits of the lawyers. You see, the lawyers are paid for every time they appear in court, or even dont attend and ask the lawyer of the opposing party to mention your case for you. Ridiculous, but true. MY personal experience. They dont care whether its fair or not, they are just there to make money and more money.
The people in govt (includes the jabatan agama people) are more concerned about the procedures, the little things like how we dress, etc rather than fairness. But its not Syariah thats wrong: Allah has set the rules right ... He is always right; but it the people who administers it that is manipulative and favours the men.
I will be going to court again on Feb 27. Wish me luck .. or if anyone knows a lawyer who can help me, please let me know. I have given up on my lawyer after paying more than RM5000 and he still wants more when the case has not progressed much. I dont have any more money to spend on lawyers.
omg. thats really silly. Its true though. I pray that things like this don't repeat. So unfair. Such trivial matters do they pay attention to but neglect what really matters. Shame on them
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